There are a number of aspects that will affect your married life. It’s best to talk about it beforehand, and not assume anything. Here are six topics…
The things you’ll want to talk about before your marriage can vary depending on how long you’ve known each other. If you’re already living together, there may be topics you’ve already worked on. However, it is important to review these aspects to assess what similarities and differences you will have to deal with. Don’t assume anything in advance because in reality, your individual expectations may be very different.
Here are six topics you should discuss with your partner before you get married:
Write a monthly budget for your first month of marriage. Answer the following questions-
If you both work, what is your total combined income? If one of you is still studying, what are the tuition fees and loans to be paid? What percentage of your income should be saved or spent? What are your financial goals?
It is best to know what kind of work you will be doing. Will you have a unique work schedule or will your work hours coincide? You should also talk about how you will prioritize time together, alone time, and social time. And if you have differences in this, it is important to reflect on how you will adapt to each other’s demands.
Sex is an essential part of love life. Be sure to discuss your expectations for frequency and type of sexual preferences. Also, you should talk about how you plan to prioritize sex as you get older and life gets busier with careers and kids. You should also discuss your expectations for your wedding night and honeymoon. And if there is a past you need to communicate about; it is very valuable information that you may want to know about each other. Don’t pretend or be vague, be specific about your needs, so no one is blindsided by what’s to come.
This is a basic concept, which can be a source of much confusion and conflict. Traditionally, women had to do the housework while men went to work. But that is changing as more and more women enter the workforce. As a result, it is essential to share household chores equally. Make a schedule or calendar to help determine who will work on what responsibility and on what days of the week. Consider these duties of grocery shopping, meal preparation, cleaning up after meals, taking out the trash, doing laundry, cleaning, and maintaining the house.
You should both share how you feel about counseling in general. Do you see it as a healthy maintenance step or a last resort? Talk to each other if you would be embarrassed to go to counseling or if you have a negative experience that makes you resist it. Be clear under what circumstances you should seek couples counseling and to what extent you can share your difficulties with friends and family.
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Having separate social lives along with shared activities is a healthy way to maintain a relationship. How much time you can spend on friendships and how you feel about your partner traveling with friends should be out in the open. Also, knowing the social needs of others will help you plan ahead.
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